sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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