Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
