sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Randomize
