Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
