she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
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