It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
