Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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