sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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