I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
