Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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