Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Everyone says I win the strip club
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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