I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
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