When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
