So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
