Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
