he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
