Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
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