it was like eating out sand paper
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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