If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
