Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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