More tranny stories later!
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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