That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I FOUND THE LEGS
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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