I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
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