i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
I cut my penus on the lid.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Randomize