But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize