Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
