im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
