Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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