The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Couch. On fire.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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