So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
