hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Randomize
