I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
