Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
