My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
