I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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