I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
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