come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize