carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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