hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
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