The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
