what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
I party with great urgency now.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
