u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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