We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
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