The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
