I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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