How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Pooping to opera.
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