The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Randomize
