Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
