Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
