this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
