It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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