We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
